Canada Wins Gold at Apology Olympics

Canada's Prime Minister likes to deeply regret the shallowness of previous regrets about the national shame of Apology Deficit Disorder.

Justin Trudeau, the most apologetic prime minister in Canadian history, is currently sorry for making another official national holiday -- and then taking a holiday on it ("Reconcilation Day"). Previously he apologized for not recusing himself from discussions about a government contract, which followed fast on the heels of his previous Seasonal Apology to Indigenous People.

“Apology Deficit Disorder is a hangover from our nation's colonial past,” he feels. “Past apologies have not been sufficiently inclusive, diverse and equitable.” He deeply regrets the hurt this has caused the un-mollified, whoever they may be, and hopes his honeyed words will inclusively sweeten the mood of diverse future voters.

“That's simply not enough,” reply critics representing whichever group isn't accepting whatever apology he's making this time.

The Prime Minister of the country that apologizes for winning Gold at the Olympics because it's not Silver, is aiming for first place in the International Apology Olympics. Having been beaten last year by Norway in the race for a seat at the UN Security Council (sorry, Norway), Prime Minister Trudeau is seeking a seat on the International Apology Council.

In pursuit of that goal, Canada tearfully acknowledges genocide against any group under-targeted by the Regretability Movement. Trudeau pledges to set up an Emergency Grovelling Fund to ensure future access of all identity groups to Equal Apology Opportunities, which he acknowledges were not properly provided by those previous Prime Ministers whose statues are now being justifiably knocked down.

“I'm sorry, eh?” he says in an effort to preclude that happening to any future statue of himself.

Premiers, mayors, military leaders and national charities join the Prime Minister in Canada's ongoing National Apology Fest.

https://www.msn.com/en-ca/news/canada/italian-canadians-to-get-formal-apology-for-treatment-during-second-world-war/ar-BB1fESTJ?ocid=spartandhp

(https://globalnews.ca/news/7173115/justin-trudeau-we-charity/)

https://nationalpost.com/pmn/news-pmn/canada-news-pmn/a-timeline-of-official-apologies-from-the-federal-government (1988-2019)

Governments' Apology to Nature

Governments, churches and corporations are falling all over each other to apologize to whoever demands it. Is it some sort of self-help exercise -- admitting guilt to groups they have ostensibly harmed? 

If they wish to apologize for harm done, Government (and public bodies) should be apologizing to Nature:

Sorry Forests, for logging you

Sorry Ocean, for filling you with plastic

Sorry Soil, for stealing your water and covering you with concrete

Sorry Wildlife, for stealing your habitats

Sorry Birds, for poisoning you with pesticides

Sorry Fish, for genocidal fishing that's wiping you out

Sorry Whales, for stealing your fish supply

Sorry, Factory-farmed and Laboratory Animals, for false imprisonment and cruel treatment

Sorry Fur-bearers, for not outlawing leg-hold traps

Sorry, Human Children, for depriving you of experience of nature, beauty, and quiet private outdoor places 

We admit that in the pursuit of profit and ethics-free corporate alliances, and by irrationally ignoring conservation science, human psychology and animal ethology, we have trampled on everything that many hold dear. We promise to restore what has been stolen from other species, compensate victims, and hold ourselves to a higher standard in future. We ask for your forgiveness -- and hope you'll consider us in future elections.