State of Health Care in Canada - Miss Polly and Her Dolly Would Die

Did you sing the Miss Polly tune in kindergarten? If so, that would be back in the day when the Canadian health care system could generally be relied on. Do you remember the tune? Try singing the new version:

By golly it's not jolly to be sick sick sick

When there isn't any doctor coming quick quick quick 

He won't be coming with his stethoscope

And a black bag of headache pills and fever-dope

The doctors have retired or they have gone online

So you'll line up at a clinic for a very long time

Someone walking by might frown and shake their head

And say these patients should be home and lying in bed

The health care officials never think about that

As they peck away at keyboards with a rat-a-tat-tat               

Bureaucrats regulate and germs thrive well                      

Health Departments send the bill, and taxes swell  

                                                                                

Change of Vocabulary, Post-COVID

We hope we've inoculated COVID away,

and want certain phrases also not to stay

Let's hear no more of “vaccination”,

“plexiglass” and hand sanitation

Don't say “lockdown” or mention a mask,

and who's been vaccinated let's not ask

Don't say “challenged”, don't say “bubble”,

all reference to “distance” reminds us of trouble

Let's stop saying “tunnel”, with light at the end of,

or planks or curves we flattened the bend of

Don't say “essential” of services or workers,

or visitors, travel, or "virtual-shirkers"

Don't say “needle” or even “arm”,

which reminds us of horrors and causes alarm

Hospitals: stop saying “herd immunity”

and “respirator” with impunity

To skip all reference is wiser,

to Astrazeneca, Moderna and Pfizer

The very mention of a vax passport

often causes nothing but a very loud snort

When we hear “pivot”, “variant” and “surge”

to cover our ears is an overwhelming urge

If COVID really ends these words will melt away,

we'll choose other language, having other things to say

Maybe something eloquent without a silly rhyme?

Let's save that habit for another place and ... day. 

Once we get post-COVID, let's change the lexicon

Once we've inoculated COVID away

there'll be no need for certain words to stay

Let's stop talking of “isolation”,

“plexiglass”, “meters” and “vaccination”

Don't say “lockdown” or mention a mask,

and whether you're vaccinated I won't ask

Don't say “challenged”, don't say “bubble”,

all reference to “distance” reminds us of trouble

Stop saying “tunnel”, with light at the end of,

or planks or curves we flattened the bend of

Don't say “essential” of services or workers,

or visitors, travel, or virtual shirkers

Don't say “needle” or even “arm”,

it reminds us of horror, it causes alarm

Doctors, don't say “herd immunity”

and talk of “respirators” with impunity

To skip all reference would be wiser,

to Moderna, Astrazeneca and Pfizer

When we hear “pivot”, “variant” and “surge”

covering our ears becomes an overwhelming urge

But if COVID ever ends, these words will melt away,

we'll choose other language, having other things to say

Maybe something eloquent, not said in rhyme,

we can change that too, in another place and … hour